I had an iPhone 7 plus, bought in September 2017 (yep, that’s a while ago). It looked like new. If you saw it, you would say it just came out of the shop. The battery was still in very decent condition, and the overall performance was great.
But I felt I deserved an upgrade, specially because the new models take amaaaaaazing photos.
So, I bought a new iPhone. And decided to sell the old one.
I’m a copywriter, so I went beyond the “Iphone 7 Plus for sale, in optimal condition” and the list of specs.
I wanted my ad to stand out and be as loud as your vegan friend at a BBQ party.
So I used the PASTOR formula to write the ad. This is what I did:
Contents
1. Analise the situation:
👍🏻 Advantages of the phone:
- It’s in optimal condition. Zero damage.
- Battery life is amazing for its age.
- It’s an iPhone (The power of brand)
- It’s affordable
- Good storage space (128gb)
👎🏻 Disadvantages:
- It’s an old model
- It’s used
- Battery is not like the first day
👻 Who would buy this?
- Parents whose children want an iPhone
- People who want an iPhone but cannot afford a new model
- People looking for a good phone at a bargain price
2. Define the target audience
Based on things I’ve heard from other parents and previous experiences (this is a very poor market research, but didn’t feel like wasting too much time), I decided to target the first group.
3. Write the advert using copywriting techniques
And then I wrote an advert using a custom version of the PASTOR formula. PASTOR is an advanced version of PAS. Check it out:
- P- Problem. Present your customers’ problem.
- A- Agitate. Agitate it adding some emotion.
- S- Solution. Show the solution to the problem.
- T- Testimonials / Transformation. Show how people’s lives have changed thanks to your product.
- O- Offer. Explain all the things that your product includes.
- R- Response / Call to action. Tell them what to do next.
My advert, with the PASTOR copywriting formula:
And this is how I structured my advert:
P- Problem:
“If your child wants an iPhone…”
A- Agitate:
“…but don’t want to spend a month’s salary, because you know they won’t take proper care of it…”
S- Solution:
“…this [a used iPhone that looks like new] is the perfect phone for you!”
- Advantages: “It’s super well kept, looks like new! Always with a cover and protective glass, and it rarely fell on the floor. ”
- Benefits: “Your child won’t complain because you bought them a shabby phone, and you save money.”
T- Testimonials/Transformation
In this case, I had to skip this part.
O- Offer
“This is what you get if you buy this phone:
- 128gb
- Spare tempered glass screen protector.
- Pink transparent hard case.
- Transparent silicone case with strings (like in the pic)
- Charging cable.
- Cool Apple stickers.
- Price: €200
Reassure buyers: It’s not a scam, I just bought a new phone and need to sell this one. You can test it.
R- Response or Call to action:
“Do you have any questions? Feel free to contact me.”
I got over a dozen of offers (also from audiences #2 and #3) and in less than 24h, I closed the deal at a fair price for both parties. SUCCESS!
You can also sell your stuff online using copywriting techniques. Go ahead and let me know how it went!
Related posts:
How to make your social media audience buy from you without telling them to buy
“We don’t lock you in a contract” – Why negative language is not a good idea in advertising
Overcome writer’s block and write a successful text in 6 simple steps
The man who legally scammed thousands with the power of words.